on "small but certain happiness"
A while ago, I picked up the phrase small but certain happiness, which, I learned very late, is a phrase coined from Haruki Murakami's essay "Afternoon in the Islets of Langerhans."
Due to the lack of translations, I only managed to read snippets floating around the internet. But, according to this article, Murakami exemplifies a small piece of happiness as eating freshly-baked bread with his hands or wearing a new shirt that smells like clean cotton.
Perhaps an interlude, but I initially thought Islets of Langerhans attributes to a place, perhaps the name of a village. Interestingly, I discovered that, instead, it refers to a clusters of pancreatic cells containing different types of cells. One of these cell types, the beta cells, produces serotonin - the happiness hormone. I am assuming this is the connection between the title and the phrase, small but certain happiness.
I always struggled to find meaning, often succumbing to ceaseless cycles of negative thought patterns. I feel like I was constantly seeking a grand purpose in my life. Nothing felt enough. This cycle, I learned from a counsellor I used to see, was a huge contributor to my fickle mental health. Small but certain happiness has been a phrase that I am determinedly trying to implement in my own life.
I think it means finding the happiness in the trivial, the mundane, the ordinariness of our daily lives. Why am I always seeking a grand purpose when happiness is right there, in the small parts of my daily activities? I thought to myself. What does contentment mean to me?
It's in drinking my coffee in the morning. Listening to a song I love. Posting on Bearblog. Finally grasping a concept I have been struggling with in class. Laughing with a friend. Finishing a book. Crossing off tasks from a long to-do list. You see, it's not grand, but it's still there.